Am i losing my sanity?

Dear Diary,

I think i might go crazy. All i've been doing is updating my blog about him. Yea it sounds crazy enough to me. I need to do something to keep me busy so that i won't remember anything about him. Adamaya. Adamaya. Yea as if this will work. Or maybe i should spend more time memorizing my sejarah notes because exam is gonna be welcoming me soon. But then again, studying is not my cup of tea but i promise i'll study hard for my future - it's not like i have any choice or anything. Serious talk, i really wish your shadow could just disappear from my thoughts. The thought of you is making me lose my sanity and even sometimes i wonder how you do it. It's really unfortunate to me that God has given you this special power to make my heart melt so easily. The worst part is, you don't even know it, let alone noticing it. It's funny how sometimes i think of you and wonder if you ever think of me. But someone once told me that if God doesn't give you want you want, then it's not what you need. I guess i don't need him then?